tuesday with morrie: a reflection

Carina- Yes, as usual, you are Right about the finer things in life. I did enjoy your recommended read- Tuesdays with Morrie. And No – I did Not bust open the flood gates and burst into tears.The final moments of Morris Schwartz’s life validate the suspicions I have in mine in regards to the subjectivity of what one deems as the “finer things in life”.

Life is not about how fast our cars can go, how big our mansions are, how many country club memberships we hold or when is the bill payment for our platinum credit cards.

Even though most of us identify with the aforementioned urban progressive lifestyle- a truly meaningful Life should Never be as detached and void as such.

We have been very disillusioned by the most grotesque form of peer pressure in which we strive to achieve happiness in knowing that we hold a bigger, better, shinier material yardstick than our neighbor. Thus, doing what we humans do best- we have created a different world for ourselves to reaffirm our beliefs without even questioning the validity of what we believe in; In this virtual world, we try to substitute our happiness with materialism just so we can be consistent with the system of belief of those around us. This in turn draws us into a never ending vicious cycle of trying to quench our materialistic thirst- an insatiable thirst really, due to the fact that materialism and happiness are both mutually exclusive elements of life. This conventional vicious cycle, most unfortunately is one that will eventually rob us of the opportunity to ever realize the true meaning of life – a happy life, without any material demands besides those for sustenance.

Morrie showed me that a good life benefits oneself the least and delights and prioritizes the needs everyone around us the most. It is by learning to give, to care and to love others before ourselves that we will find reconciliation within ourselves. We will never find happiness in stacking ourselves up with the busiest schedule, nor will happiness comes in the form of a brand new Beamer. Temporal happiness maybe. But will we still feel the joy for our Beamer in 15 years? People of our generation could not been more misled. Gen-X’ers revel in cosmetic vanity (in a deeper sense than make ups and boob jobs) and we find exhilaration in the subjugation of others and comfort in getting the approval of others to validate our existence- all of which is sadly, merely our inferiority complex revealing her ugly head. This is why when people achieve all that they ever dream of materialistically, strangely they are bound to feel neither joy or inner peace as they have come to expect. The underlining reason can only be that ignorantly, we have been chasing after the Wrong things in life. Evidently, this further extents to explain the sudden outward implosion in religious group memberships as religions tend to teach her disciples to turn away from material (and also sadly, that gay people and pro-choicers are going to burn in hell while pedophilic priest sits next to the throne of God and watch them burn in laughter – lollipop in one hand and fondling cherubs with another) and spend more time in love and compassion with those around us just as what Morrie had advocated thru out his book.

Before I came to the States, I was a prideful kid brimming with confidence at how well and fast I can learn to manipulate any systems and exploit them to my own personal gains. Non First-class college results? No worries – be active in areas outside nerdy studies and then study hard to prove that I was an all rounder. Crappy looking resume? Learn to speak articulately, be a student leader *Yay!* and represent the country and get my face splashed unashamedly across all major newspapers *DOUBLE Yay!*. Crappy college life? Headed straight to the land of the free, home of the braves, lived free spiritedly without a care and then manipulated the system to stay on for a period 3 times longer than any students are allowed to for 10 times lesser the cost.

I always revel at basking in the fruits of my tactful shrewdness which I know will make me a good whore of a climber of those seemingly daunting yet strangely-familiar corporate ladders- built by nice friendly people who would not hesitate for one second to cheat a 80 year old grandma of her healthcare policy.

However, I have been questioning myself lately, is that all i want out of my life? To look good in front of others? To command respect out of awe? To just get on with life the same way the rest of the world does? or is there really more to life than the conventional lets start a business and make my first million then buy my first Beamer Z4 and then make my 2nd million and then buy my first Ferrari and then make my 3rd million – when does the cycle end? or does it ever?

A handful of Americans who has been living as Morrie did taught me that life is NOT just about material pursuit; it is most importantly about what I can offer to the people around me to make the world a better place. I want to leave a legacy, one that is made out of my personal relationships with people around me rather than one which people, my family, my kids, my friends stare in isolation and detachment after I die and hopefully burn in eternal hell- cos’ I would never want to be next to any pedophiles in heaven.

People die – Relationships, in the words of Morrie – goes on forever.

Relationships with people are just too important to be secondary in life- something which I need to constantly remind myself. I have hurried thru my life, thru conversations; never seem to be able to focus wholeheartedly when I am talking with anyone- always thinking about what I am going to do next. I dread to suffer the irony of being detached from the world around me and only realize the extent of my detachment at the last few months of my life. I want to exude love and be consumed by love from all around me.

I want to live in Love.

Morris Schwartz, Thank you. I pray for the Lord’s grace to be upon you, just as your words are to my stone cold heart.

“-Love each other or perish-”